I said recently, and many times in the past, with a bit of sorrow, "I'm just so broken." That somehow this world has done irreparable damage to my soul, and this broken-ness has separated me from others, and maybe even from my Savior.
While my head knows the truth of the Gospel, and those comments are absurd in the context of my head knowledge, my heart sometimes disagrees.
But I have been comforted. God reminds me that He is near to the brokenhearted and He saves those who are crushed in spirit. Was this His plan all along? I think so. He knew me before I was even born. My days were written long before I lived even one of them.
Why would a broken heart be part of His plot for the story of my life? How can He draw near to me, if I refuse to believe the true status of my soul? How can I know the lowly state of my nature without feeling the weight of sin.
I am broken! But not beyond repair. While I live in this sin-broken world though, I will never see my life completely repaired. Lest I seek perfection over seeking God, who alone is perfect.
I am broken, and the more I grasp that knowledge, the more I understand that is the best place to be. As Paul says, I will boast all the more in my weaknesses. His grace is sufficient for me, when I am weak, He is strong.