I am so excited about all my friends that are Homeschooling! Whatever the reasons, I am a true believer that being home with your kids is the best thing for them. Don't get me wrong, you gotta do what you gotta do, and if that means you gotta work and put your kids in public school, then by all means, do that. But spending time with your children, when ever possible, is the only way to teach them, to love them, to raise them up to be godly adults some day.
If I am being honest, I would have to say that being a stay at home mom was never on my to-do list. I remember a conversation I had when I was in high school, about to graduate. I was filling out forms for government assistance programs, financial aid, and loans, narrowing down my college choices, and planning my future. "I will not be a stay at home mom. I want to do something with my life, and staying home is not an option."
Here I am some many years later, a stay-at-home mom!
I LOVE MY JOB!
Again, if I am being honest, it isn't always perfect. In fact, 90% of the time, I am worrying and fretting that I might be somehow ruining my children. But, when the day (or maybe week, and sometimes month) is done, and I see some real fruit of my labor, it feels my heart with joy. A true joy! But I must give credit where credit is due. If I really tally up the times I have missed the mark, and the times I did something right, I have to admit that there something else at work somehow connecting the dots that I have overlooked or willfully ignored. These girls that I attempt to raise really belong to God, and I am learning to trust that He has better plans for them than I could possibly imagine.
That doesn't mean I just take my hands off the wheel and somehow expect this train to stay on the tracks, but it does mean that when I am off track, I can trust God to bring me back. I can trust God to bring the whole runaway-train-headed-for-a-wreck, into His will.
It's scary and beautiful all at once. Beautiful that God has seen fit to place in my care these children, and scary that He placed in my care these children. I mean, I am fallen and sinful and the list doesn't stop there. But praise God for grace!
Sweet, freeing grace.
He is made strong in my weakness, and I pray that my girls see the importance of grace and relying on His strength.
And that is where I am, today. Yesterday, I was a frenzied mess, wrapped up in my self and my short comings. But His mercy is new every morning. Lord, help me to show my children, your daughters, what it means to trust in You. That when we fail Your grace takes our short comings and fills in the gaps, it connects the dots, it is made complete only in You.