My Beloved-Kari Jobe

You're My Beloved
You're My Bride
To sing over you is
My delight
Come away with Me
My love
You're Beautiful to Me
So beautiful to Me
Under My mercy
Come and wait
Till we are standing face to face
I see no stain on you
My child
You're Beautiful to Me
So Beautiful to Me
I sing over you
My song of peace
Cast all your care down at
My feet
Come and find your rest in Me
I'll breathe My life inside of you
I'll bear you up on eagle's wings
And hide you in the shadow of My strength
I'll take you to My quiet waters
I'll restore your soul
Come rest in Me and be made whole
You're My beloved
You're My Bride
To sing over you is my delight
Come away with me my love


Thank you Lord, for reminding me that Your mercy covers me. You make me beautiful.

Healer

I have loved this song from the first time I heard it. What an amazing God we serve, who faithful to His promises. When He says we will go through and not be burned, He proves it. And I think this video shows just that.
The most fitting scripture I could think of was Isaiah 43:2

When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze.

Below are the lyrics to this wonderful song by Kari Jobe.

You hold my every moment
You calm my raging seas
You walk with me through fire
And heal all my disease

I trust in You
I trust in You

I believe You're my healer
I believe You are all I need
I believe You're my portion
I believe You're more than enough for me
Jesus, You're all I need

You hold my every moment
You calm my raging seas
You walk with me through fire
And heal all my disease

I trust in You
I trust in You

I believe You're my healer
I believe You are all I need
I believe You're my portion
I believe You're more than enough for me
Jesus, You're all I need

Nothing is impossible for You
Nothing is impossible for You
Nothing is impossible for You
Nothing is impossible for You

Briefly

Well, this will be brief. I know there was a lot going on before I decided to go on a blog hiatus. First the praise:

All tests were normal! There was some concern at first because the polyp ended up being about 3 times larger than what the ultrasound showed. But, my God is bigger! :) Regarding the DNA test, God answered my prayer and showed me the course of action He wants me to take. Dan 3. Without making this into a long study, He basically showed me to not bow my knee to fear, and the DNA test was exactly that, fear. God has been so faithful to me over the last several weeks, and I just want to take time to give Him glory!

Next:

Well, I don't really have anything else, but since I had a "first", then I needed a "next". Hehe! I hope to be posting soon. There have been a lot of things that God has been showing and speaking to me, but mostly it has been for me. I am definately going through some growing pains, but I know that God is with me and His plan is to bring about His good work, in me.

Thank you Lord for Your faithfullness!

Psalm 91
1 He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High
will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
2 I will say of the LORD, "He is my refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust."
3 Surely he will save you from the fowler's snare
and from the deadly pestilence.
4 He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge;
his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.
5 You will not fear the terror of night,
nor the arrow that flies by day,
6 nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness,

nor the plague that destroys at midday.
7 A thousand may fall at your side,

ten thousand at your right hand,

but it will not come near you.
8 You will only observe with your eyes

and see the punishment of the wicked.
9 If you make the Most High your dwelling—

even the LORD, who is my refuge-
10 then no harm will befall you,

no disaster will come near your tent.
11 For he will command his angels concerning you

to guard you in all your ways;
12 they will lift you up in their hands,

so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.
13 You will tread upon the lion and the cobra;

you will trample the great lion and the serpent.
14 "Because he loves me," says the LORD, "I will rescue him;

I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.
15 He will call upon me, and I will answer him;

I will be with him in trouble,

I will deliver him and honor him.
16 With long life will I satisfy him

and show him my salvation."

I was young, and terrified of the dark. I could hardly sleep at night, I was so afraid, and even my dreams would scare me. My mom, had me memorize this passage. Yes, the whole passage. And everytime I got scared, I'd start repeating it, and I could feel the peace of God. Now, here I am many years later, and when I am scared or anxious, or just worrying, I go back to this passage. Now, I ask myself a few questions as I recite Psalms 91.

Am I dwelling in the secret place of the Most High? Am I running to Him for shelter? Have I called upon Him? Do I love the Lord? His promises are always true, but I must realize that I have to go to Him.

Lord, I am need of Your shelter. Cover me with the shadow of Your wings. I will find my peace in You, my refuge and my fortress.

The Valley Song by Jars of Clay

You have led me to the sadness
I have carried this pain
On a back bruised, nearly broken
I'm crying out to you

Chorus
I will sing of Your mercy
That leads me through valleys of sorrow
To rivers of joy

When death like a Gypsy
Comes to steal what I love
I will still look to the heavens
I will still seek your face
But I fear you aren't listening
Because there are no words
Just the stillness and the hunger
For a faith that assures

Chorus x2

Alleluia, alleluia
Alleluia, alleluia
While we wait for rescue
With our eyes tightly shut
Face to the ground using our hands
To cover the fatal cut
And though the pain is an ocean
Tossing us around, around, around
You have calmed greater waters
Higher mountains have come down

Chorus

Yeah
Alleluia, alleluia
Alleluia, alleluia
Alleluia, alleluia alleluia, alleluia
Alleluia, alleluia alleluia, alleluia

Chorus (4 Xs)
Oh, Lord sing of Your mercy,
MercyYour mercy

Like A Cloud Over My Head

First let me just say "Ugh!"

For several months now I have been dealing with some abnormal "female" issues (guys reading I'm sure this will bore you!). And last month, it finally got to a point that I just could not ignore it anymore. I know ignoring a problem is never a good idea, but I have never enjoyed going to the doctor, and I don't like the way they look at me after seeing my family history. Thus the cloud over my head.

So, I'll go back a little and give some background. It starts with my grandad dying of cancer when I was really young. I don't really know what type, I've only assumed it was lung cancer cause I know he smoked. Then, a few years later, his wife, my grandmother lost a long battle with breast cancer. And when I was in the 5th grade, my mom discovered a lump in her breast, but by the time she was diagnosed with cancer, it was too late to do anything except chemo. She lost her battle about 6 months later.

This is the family history that doctors look at, and immediately lable me. I have fought the fears of cancer for a long time, and I had finally felt as though I had gained a victory over that fear, until just before I turned 30. I received a letter from my other grandmother, and in it she explained how she was always concerned with my health, and that it was important for me to do self examinations, and get mammograms. Most people, I'm sure would appreciate the gesture, and I did, but at the same time I was flooded with a terrible nightmare, I thought had gone away. My mother was just 32 when she died, and I am now only 2 years shy of that age.

So, two weeks ago, I found myself sitting in the office of an OBGYN, having the conversations, I had run from for a long time. "Given your family history, I'm going to make some suggestions..." and she proceeded to tell me all things I didn't want to hear; mammogram and a DNA test to see if I have a cancer gene. Do I really need that? I already know that I am at a greater risk of getting cancer than most women, so why do I need this test? And if I do take it and it shows that I do have this gene, what next? My options; masectomy. Do I want to know?

Then on to the reason I was there. I had previously had an ultrasound, that showed a "something" in my uterus, but they weren't sure what it was, and now the doctor was telling me that to be sure, they needed another ultrasound, one that would give them a better view. On Monday, I got the results of that ultrasound. There is a thickening of the lining, and a polyp of decent size. So, next week, I'm going back to the doctor, only this time to remove the polyp so that it can be sent for testing.

Playing this waiting game has opened a door seeds of fear. Everyday, I am bombarded with thoughts of "what if". My prayer lately has been for peace. And I have been reminding myself of Phillipians 4:8-9

8Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. 9Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.

Thank you for your prayers!

Run For Your Life

This was a very moving video. We are in a battle, and souls are being lost every day. Eph 6:10-17 reminds us that this is a battle not against people, but against spiritual forces. Yesterday in church it was said that we take it personally when we are under attack or struggling spititually. When Goliath taunted the Isrealites, and when the enemy tries to stir up fear in us, or taunts us, he is mocking God. But what do we do? We run away, or we hide, or even surrender, when we should be running to the battle, trusting that God is on our side! It's not about me. I see that now, and I want to stand strong in the Lord, and His might. I will trust in Him!