Ooey Gooey

Excerpt from Discovering The Way, "The Great Romance":

There is a God who we call Father that does pursue us He is the King of all kings who's love is so large that it could not be contained in the star filled sky. He seeks us out when we are lost and pursues us until we come home to him. I love this time that i live in when my love is fulfilled in Him who comes for me. This time i call The Great Romance. He shows me things of love i can and can not yet comprehend, but those things that i can not yet understand i long for, and those that i do understand make me laugh and joyous and excited for others to understand. His love is amazing. It is an intoxicating thing. To be surrounded by this love is to be drowned in true joy. I long to breathe in the love, deeply breathe in and out so that it fills me and overflows for others to see and drown in.


The first time I read this, I thought "That's a little too ooey, gooey for me." But I keep coming back to it. I keep thinking about "When Heaven Weeps", by Ted Dekker. My initial reaction to this book was much like my reaction to John's blog (Sorry John). It doesn't seem realistic to me. In real life, if someone continues to betray your trust, you stop trusting them! In real life, how can I have an "intoxicating" relationship with an invisible God?

I don't remember when I became such a rational person. But I have stopped believing in miracles, in feelings, in emotions, in relationships. These are romantic ideals that don't exist in this world. I didn't realize I was like this until recently. I can't imagine myself being "carried away" in a current of God's love. People would think I'm crazy! I could just see myself having a conversation with Stacy's brother, and being laughed out of the house for being so simple minded. I have rationalized my relationship with God. Yes, God is real. He is the creator, He is in control of everything we see and don't see, and He is constantly working in my life. Is He loving? To me, I see a "tough love" kind of God, but I have never seen Him as a Father, pursuing His child, longing to run to me, to pick me up, to clean me off, and to forget all past offenses. I've never known that kind of love.

The bible repeatedly calls Jesus the Bridegroom. He is the Bridegroom in Song of Solomon. We are His bride. He pursues with passion, out of His love for us, He went to the cross. It wasn't just because it was His duty, or a job He was called to do, it was because of love. Once again, in "When Heaven Weeps", we see the symbolism play out. Jan is a man who is madly in love, and willing to die for his bride, even though she has betrayed him beyond all reasonable measure. I was discussing this with Stacy and I was of course dismissing this notion as unrealistic. Then I was brought once again to Hosea, and the love God has for His chosen. Hosea took a wife, a prostitute, he provided for her, he loved her, called her his own. What did she do? She went right back to it. But he was made to love her. He went and bought her, and brought her home.

Where do I fit in all this? Am I chosen? Does heaven weep for me?

God, I believe that You chose me. Before I was born You called me. You made me for You. I am made to love You, I am born to worship You. Everything that is in me calls out to You. My soul cries out for You. I want to succumb to the waves of Your love. My flesh clings to this world though. I am tethered to this worlds reality by the pains of this world.

Psalms 42
1As the deer pants for the water brooks,
So my soul pants for You, O God.
2My soul thirsts for God, for the living God;
When shall I come and appear before God?
3My tears have been my food day and night,
While they say to me all day long, "Where is your God?"
4These things I remember and I pour out my soul within me
For I used to go along with the throng and lead them in procession to the house of God,
With the voice of joy and thanksgiving, a multitude keeping festival.
5Why are you in despair, O my soul?
And why have you become disturbed within me?
Hope in God, for I shall again praise Him
For the help of His presence.
6O my God, my soul is in despair within me;
Therefore I remember You from the land of the Jordan
And the peaks of Hermon, from Mount Mizar.
7Deep calls to deep at the sound of Your waterfalls;
All Your breakers and Your waves have rolled over me.
8The LORD will command His loving kindness in the daytime;
And His song will be with me in the night,
A prayer to the God of my life.
9I will say to God my rock, "Why have You forgotten me?
Why do I go mourning because of the oppression of the enemy?"
10As a shattering of my bones, my adversaries revile me,
While they say to me all day long, "Where is your God?"
11Why are you in despair, O my soul?
And why have you become disturbed within me?
Hope in God, for I shall yet praise Him,
The help of my countenance and my God.